pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
