her vagine was all disorganized.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
My pussy is not your playground.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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