i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Swine flu is the new snow day.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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