worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
