Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
you would pick up someone in the library
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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