a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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