She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize
