Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
