it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Randomize
