Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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