You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
