okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
