i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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