Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
