You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
