dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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