I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
