Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
