Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
