i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
