U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
