I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
