Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize