marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I seem to have left my pride at pride
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
