Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
