She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
i think we sleep fucked last night...
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
