I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
