tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize