we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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