I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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