Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
