North Korea, Best Korea!
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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