you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
