what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Randomize
