I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I just want to make out with him forever
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
