His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Randomize
