I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
