He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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