I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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