Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
