marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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