Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
