if i died would you start the facebook group?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize