Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
