Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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