Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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