I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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