Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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