Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
