I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Farmville is her only friend.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
